


Ache

by Averia



Category: DCU (Comics), Nightwing (Comics), Under the Red Hood
Genre: Asexuality, Fear of Death, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-19
Updated: 2015-09-19
Packaged: 2018-04-21 13:57:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4831601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Averia/pseuds/Averia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Wake me up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ache

Jason had never thought his second life could still be about love when it had started with revenge and hatred. But how often had his life played out to his expectations? Never.

And now he was living in an apartment with his former not-really-never-quite brother. He still could not believe that he had fallen for him somewhere between life and death. Knowing that Dick truly loved him too did not help either, it made the whole thing even more unreal.

His arms embraced the calm sleeping form beside him and he curled around his lover. It was everything he needed, someone to hold onto. 

Romantic relationships had been so absent in his life that he had at some point come to terms with the fact, that he did not need the sexual aspect at all. He had always only searched for someone to understand him. Before he had told Dick about his absent sexual attraction he had thought the relationship would only be temporary, despite his desire to clutch onto him and to never let go. He knew Dick after all. Plenty of sexual relationships had been formed during his life.

They had fought just seconds before he had told Dick and the stupid idiot had embraced him instead of walking away.

“I don’t care,” he had said and Jason had gritted his teeth, not believing a word because he still could not trust and the anger at the world was still too strong. He could not believe someone would sacrifice anything for him. 

“I am serious,” Dick had said, slowly as if talking to a child and Jason had not been able to look anywhere but into the blue eyes, “I just want to be close to you.”

They had stayed with cuddling for months now and the whole discussion had not come up again and he was slowly coming to his own realization that Dick only cared for the touch and the nearness, not for the act in itself. He was lucky to have something uncomplicated and it was probably the reason why he would never say no if Dick ever wished for them to go all the way. He did not need such kind of actions and it would never awake the feeling Dick would get but if it would mean seeing joy in his eyes, he would grant this wish at least once.

“You’re back,” mumbled the sleepy voice and Dick turned to place a kiss on his nose and he huffed just to see the smile on Dick’s lips, “Wayne Gala. Tomorrow or better today. Five hours. Sleep. Now.”

Jason sighed. He had forgotten about the Wayne Gala but it had been Alfred of all people asking him and he could never say no to the old man. They hooked their legs together and drifted asleep. 

Jason woke in the middle of the night to a chill seeping into his bones, to missing breathe, and a missing heartbeat under his palm but not a missing person. He squeezed his eyes harder together, hoping the nightmare would be over while hot tears streamed down his face.

_Please wake me up._

_Wake me up._

_Goddamn it._

 

_Please._

 

He filled his lungs with air again when he finally felt warm hands on his cheeks and a whisper in his ear. 

His eyes stayed squeezed shut.


End file.
